Hello, dear people of the internet. How are you? That’s great. I’m horrible, thanks for asking. Strap yourselves in, because I’m really unhappy this week. Much more so than last week.
Item 1: Main computer: Why do you always malfunction on Mondays? I get it, no one likes Mondays, but come one. Mondays are already bad enough on their own, now you must go on strike, be slow, and refuse to load anything? Regularly? I don’t get it. I fed you all your updates, I let the virus scanner have a look at you a couple times a week… is it your graphics card? Damn computer guy is of course all booked until gods know when, guess this problem is here to stay.
Item 2: Life. I’ve been a bullying victim for most of my life and I know when I’m being bullied. I’m currently being bullied by the universe. Nope, I’m absolutely convinced, someone in the big cubicle farm office of fate has it in for me. Look, I don’t want much. Just a good night’s sleep, some food, and three or fours hours in the evening to enjoy myself after the working day is done. Do I get any of that? Nope. I want to get something done real quick? Computer doesn’t work. I finally have some spare time? Internet connection crashes. I could finally get some sleep? Noise everywhere. I want to study? Let’s see if the old airraid alarm still works! (No, seriously.) Sometimes I think I deserve better than a job that can’t even pay my rent; than people who wouldn’t know organisation if it bit them in the ass; than a university were the proverbial left hand doesn’t know what the proverbial right hand is doing (proverbially speaking); than a barely functioning computer I saved so long for; than an unreliable SO who can’t be arsed to do his share of chores, insists that the plan we made when I was unemployed and not studying should never change, and also disrupts my sleep; than friends who almost never call unless I call them first; than a fucking empty Nutella jar. Look, universe, I’m too poor to get drunk, at least give me sugar. Man, I’m depressed.
Item 3: World of Warcraft. Okay, so I don’t know the first thing about programming, but can’t you programmer guys or whoever make the servers, I don’t know, bigger? They keep crashing and getting locked down, what’s going on? I’m not paying you monthly so I can sit in a three hour queue just to get in. If I wanted that I’d just go round the offices of national health insurance. Draw a number, wait four hours, no problem, if you’re into that. I am not into that. Look, I’m Austrian. I’m used to waiting for.ev.er. That doesn’t mean I like it.
Item 4: Wednesday. Everything I thought I had to do that day gets postponed for a week and I finally have a chance to sleep in and some assholes decide 7:30 on the only day I can finally get some sleep is the perfect time to start cutting down trees right in front of my window. Then some other assholes decide to work on a roof across the yard with fucking loud flame thrower-like things (seriously though, what are you doing up there?). It couldn’t be Tuesday where I was up and running because I had a doctor’s appointment (which got cancelled, but anyway I was up), it couldn’t be Thursday where I’m gone all day long. Nope. Wednesday it is. Of all the days in all the weeks in all the months, it had to be that particular Wednesday. No sleep for the wicked, I guess. If this keeps up I’m going to be a drug addict by New Year’s Day.
Item 5: Everything I had planned this week was postponed. So now I have a full week next week. Joy. Extra load of work, extra load of people whose behinds need kicking.
Item 6: Group homework. Who had the bright idea to assign group homework? It’s bad enough I have to do group work with a deadline at the end of January, rallying the troops to do something in the short span of two weeks is pretty much impossible. I hate group work. I work best by myself. I can organise everything, and I can hold myself accountable. But with group projects there’s this endless stupid wait for other people to do their shit. And then I have to be on their ass constantly because they ‘forget’ things or suddenly ‘don’t have time’, and it’s really exhausting.
Item 7: Relationship. I swear, this thing doesn’t last for another year if it keeps going like this. Then again, I’ve been in this relationship longer than some people stay married, so maybe it has just run its course. I just don’t feel like this is a partnership, you know, where both participants are equals? No boyfriend, doing household chores is not ‘helping me out’. It’s doing chores in your own fucking house. You know, this thing that adults have to do, whether they like it or not? You’re in your fucking thirties now, get used to it. I made this beautiful plan, it’s on a dry erase board in the hall. You no longer have an excuse like “I didn’t know what needed doing”. At least own up to being a lazy ass, don’t act like emptying the dishwasher somehow is a feat of greatness on par with the epic adventures of Gilgamesh. And no, you can’t just randomly pop into my place of work. We’re not getting paid shit, but it’s still an office. You can’t randomly come into the office I work at. Just because I get along with my co-workers and we’re all more or less the same age doesn’t mean this is a leisurely activity where you can just join because “but I’m your boyfriend”. I can’t just come along to your clients, can I?
Item 8: Depression. Get the fuck out of my life, no one wants you here. Who even invited you? You’re really just making things worse. It’s kinda hard to be productive if you keep nagging me, and it’s also kinda hard to get anything done when you’re all like, “Hey, why don’t we drop what we’re doing and go jump off a bridge instead? Wouldn’t that be fun?” No. Shut up. I swear, my depression is like an annoying, perpetually troll-faced cousin I was charged with babysitting.
Item 9: Organisation skills. Look, people, if you’re too busy to do something, why don’t you delegate some stuff? I’m more than happy to help out, but I’m not in charge (which is a problem with this world in and off itself). You, however, are. Just tell me when shit needs doing, don’t run around all frazzled and get nothing done.
Sigh. Look at all that bitching. It’s a right bitch-o-rama. A complaints-a-go-go. I think I need a friend I could talk to. Anyone selling their old one?